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Here's the Thing

  • Jun. 22nd, 2013 at 2:49 AM
I missed you guys. Yes, both of you. We used to have this purge thing where we could type what ever we wanted and it didn't matter. It was out there. It was like virtual therapy. Just reading my last post was enough to make me aware of who I was and who I want to be. I can't even begin to say that I am there. If we were there, we'ed be dead, right?!

My current self assigned art project is to look at beauty. I am taking a beauty app and creating macabre pictures. It's been a bit of a soul cleanse. I am tired of being told that I am the "for sale" package that you see in front of you. I am not neat. I don't like long walks on the beach. I fart. That doesn't make me less of a person.

I downloaded a "pretty" app that I thought would be good for making myself look better. I ended up layering the filters...and that got me thinking about taking those "perfect" pictures of myself and making them 3D.

So here I am, in the midst of a project that just might be my best idea ever. And you are there. Living, fresh buns out of the oven.

I am here, tip toeing around to see if I am the last one.

I decided

  • Feb. 1st, 2009 at 10:44 AM
That I have spent enough time exploring the dark side of my personality. It's time to explore the light side.

I'll let you know how I make out

Jan. 25th, 2009

  • 7:57 PM
The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:
- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
- What I create will be just for you.
- It'll be done this year.
- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry. I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange
-I make no promises as to timeliness

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you have to put this in your journal as well. We all can make stuff!
Also, you will have to give me an address to send said "stuff" to.


best customer e mail ever

  • Dec. 17th, 2008 at 3:13 PM

I was cc’d on this, was sent to santaclauss@northpole.com


Cousin Santy,

Please be advised that even though your books show this young lady to have been bad all year long I need to help you get your books in order. What your books show is not really true. I think the Grinch has had a Gremlin secretly erasing the good Karen has accomplished and re-writing bad stuff about her. I know this young lady and I can confirm she has been good.  Please see to it she has a good holiday.


Cousin Butch

big wiener, er, I mean winner

  • Dec. 2nd, 2008 at 11:07 AM

Soooo, I was being super mom last night making cupcakes for my daughter’s chorus program tonight and I realized I was out of butter. You can't make cupcakes without butter. I peeled off the jammies, threw on the jeans and drove to the inconvenience store next to my house. They didn’t have butter or margarine. Perhaps that is why I can’t bring myself to call it a convenience store. On to the next store. While waiting in line, I spot “Silver Bells” scratch tickets. This just happens to be the name of the song I am singing with Emma tonight. I bought 3 of them and won $100.00!

Thanks shitty store next to my house! Thanks fate! Thanks for randomness! And thank you, Tiny Tim!


  • Sep. 16th, 2008 at 7:17 PM
Went for a quick jog and took a really cool shower. I am feeling less scattered.

Now I am thinking about what Super Hero I want to be when I grow up. Something Wonder Woman-ish for sure


  • Sep. 16th, 2008 at 6:11 PM
I am in over-analyzing every thing I say to everyone mode. I hate this! It's when I replay every minor detail of every conversation I have had in the last week and wish it all away. It's horribly un-healthy and I wish I didn't do this. Perhaps if I write it out I can purge the system.
I said a whole bunch of crap to Mark's ex-girl friend/friend while I was drunk and now I feel like Homer Simpson (thinking I am cool when I am really UN cool) and I wish I could just take my mouth like a vacuum and suck all the words back up. But I can't.
I mean, I really didn't say anything too bad, but I am sure I sounded like a complete tool. Blah Blah Blah

Then I start to think that all the choices I have ever made are wrong. You know, CAUSE I AM A NUTCASE.
Anyways, this isn't helping, so I am going to a long walk on the treadmill.
Smell me later!

holy shit

  • Aug. 1st, 2008 at 5:17 PM
I am leaving my thankless job. I got an offer from a direct competitor and I am taking it. This has been a nail biting past couple of weeks, but the deal is done. I can't fucking believe it! I wish I had more time to type, but I am packing for a mini vaca in Maine this weekend. I have a whole week off, then I start my new job on the 11th.


a word about Stella (aka Smudge)

  • Jul. 4th, 2008 at 9:03 AM
I love my cat. She is so awesome. Sometimes I call her Smudges. She thinks that she is our child. She sleeps at the foot of my bed every night. When she knows I am awake, she will come up by my head and get under the blankets with me. If I don't pet her right away, she will bite my fingers, toe, arm, anything she can get at. She will sleep for hours underneath blankets, even in the summertime, even if Mark farts.

I love her even though she smells like poop sometimes. She likes to sleep in her litter box. And she " buries" her food, water, or litter box, by pawing at the walls. I always say "good job" even though I know she is not doing a good job. She is clearly not hiding anything. Stupid cat.